Much has happened in my life that I have failed to understand and my continuing failure to has caused many problems as a result. I have decided that a good way to vent this out in a positive manner is to as best as I can why certain things in my life have failed and tell how and why it did so others may not make the same mistakes I have made.
I'll admit that I'm not perfect,far from it. I am possibly the most frustratingly flawed person you might ever get to know as I have lacked the wisdom and understanding to a lot of things I have done that wasn't acceptable in one way or another and I realized too little too late on what I have done. I also need the way to positively vent this out and make it so that it doesn't hurt anyone.
Every week,I will write a segment based on my own failures and meditate on why it ended up that way and things may get personal. My hope is that while I slowly make more sense out of my life and maybe help others in the same dark places I have been.
The first topic I wish to share is something I do not like to admit. Period. That is stalking. I see a lot here in this site and soooo many others where people joke about this kind of stuff when there is no joke at all and that this is a serious issue. With the advent of social networking sites like Twitter,Facebook,and Myspace among many others,the lines and distances between people have been either shortened or done away completely. People can look for old school buddies they lost contact long ago and the distances between relationships have shortened as some members here have advocated so. But this like any form of social progress or change comes with the darker side of it all and the adversity that follows.
With people being able to share ANYTHING in Twitter and Facebook giving information to people you accepted as a friend(whether or not you know them in real life)has created an environment where activities like this has become more accessible. This like I said before is something I hate to admit but with more and more people joking about this sensitive matter is forcing my hand to say something about this and cut the crap behind it.
I won't name any names but there has been one person here I have had a crush on and it started innocent but quickly went out of control. I never met her in real life and the anguish of wanting to get to know a person more does override a lot of one's own logical thought processes. This crush slowly began to crumble to obsession and I know that posting this,that person may read and find out and may not want anything to do with me anymore. But that is a price I have to pay if I'm going to get a point across.
You see,the problem with social networking sites like Facebook is that when you create an account and you put stuff on it,there will be people who know even if you don't remember what you put in to begin with. Added insult to injury,if things have gotten out of hand for anyone,the account can NEVER be deleted and it is stuck there for all to see. Same with Tweets in Twitter. I constantly see people posting random things in their daily lives and not realize the danger it invites. When people follow your Twitter and you may have put something sensitive in there and you didn't know it,people still know and those things can't be erased. In doing things like saying where you are or what you are doing,you run the danger in leaking sensitive information that you can't undo. People telling others on Twitter something in their life and when someone in a misguided gesture of kindness ask what's wrong,you have NO excuse to freak out since you gave that information away through your Twitter and any follower can just up and read it.It is there and it can't be undone.
People do this all the time without realizing it like when a person says that they have a bad day or that things aren't working out,you air out dirty laundry that can compromise your privacy. This is not a smart thing to do at all and it can cause some repercussions. Added that with putting certain pics on Facebook or carelessly accepting Friend Requests can lead to awkward moments like this that you have invited whether you knew it or not. Just by looking at such information,you have unknowingly stalked that person and you may have bumped into a sensitive matter without realizing it.
Then there are people who ignorantly joke about stalking a person on the net thinking it is cute. I don't know about you but one thing I have realized that like rape,there is NOTHING cute about it. It is not something to joke about even among friends. Why? It is because you are making it seem socially acceptable and people may not know if you are joking or whether or not this exchange was between friends who can really get away with this. This must stop now as whenever I see more and more comments of people joking about this and into realizing what they are saying or the gravity of their choice in words,it makes me shudder to think that what if some person like me who didn't know any better would look at it and think even for a second that this is socially acceptable behavior. This is not something that should ever be acceptable in any context like comparing rape to losing a match in Halo or Call of Duty. People are making these stupid mistakes all the time and it fills me to the brim with pity and fear for the unfortunate soul behind that comment.
This also goes into marriage requests online. Long Story Short,don't do it. EVER!!!! There is no better way to freak and guy or girl out than to smother them with feeling you mistook for love. It could be something done out of affection but it is still wrong!!! You don't know that person most likely and if you do,doing this online is not the way to go a very personal matter such as swearing yourself to share a life with that special person. It should be done where the only ones present are the party of 2 involved. I have done stupid stuff like this and payed the price for it and now I'm trying to pick up the pieces of my life while giving a warning out there. My misery is of my own device and I can no longer deny that. If this is the best way for me for me to deal with this while helping others from doing the same by making this aware,then my misery has not been for nothing and I may finally learn and apply what I have been missing on the way.
I know this is better done in a blog but I have to get this out cause behavior like this and my sudden realization of how guilty I am of the same thing has come to a point where I have to face these demons and I don't want anyone else doing the same stupid stuff I have been guilty of doing. That is all for now and I hope to see you next week.