View Full Version : Clock Work RP Episode One: Spin
10thMuse
05-25-2012, 07:54 PM
Esther St. Claire is returning to her Private High School after the sudden death of her parents. Expecting a quiet reunion, outside of a few bullies, she is jolted out of reality with an encounter with a strange new student. Creatures thought only to live in fairy tales begin to seep as reality unravels.
(Clock Work is also featured at Beam Me Up podcast. Episode 6 airs this weekend.)
Thanks for listening!
Cast:
Esther: 10thMuse
Tobie: Gan Xingba
Holon: Nick Gould
Ro: TC Davies
Gus: Ry-Guy
http://youtu.be/K1xdwD7gCeI
(http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=K1xdwD7gCeI&feature=plcp)
First of all, I'd like to know more about this project. Was it written by you? Was it a fan made comic? To be honest, I had a difficult time, from this first 'episode', grasping what kind of story this is going to be. Nothing really happened and not much was explained.
As for critiques, I have a few.
When I started listening and typing notes for this review I had a hard time figuring out which cast member was which character. The woman who spoke to Esther earlier in the story, the woman on the phone, the boy at the subway, I'm not sure who was who. Being said, there wasn't much issues I noticed with performances. I did find that all of them had the same solemn tone, but I guess it matched the feel of the story, or at least, the feel I THINK you were trying to go for. The narrator did trip over her words occasionally, which perhaps could have been redone. I would also suggest using a different echo effect to Esther's inner thoughts as it made her somewhat difficult to understand.
I also feel like there was an over reliance on narration and not enough sound effects. Why was it necessary to comment about the woman in the beginning pausing, when we could have just HEARD her pausing? Why couldn't we hear Esther pull out her phone and turn it on, or hear the pencils scatter over the ground, or hear the card swipe through? This sort of comes off more like an audio book than a radio play. This isn't a bad thing but I feel like you could have included more of the story in the same space of time if you ditched the narration to just important bits or ditched it entirely.
10thMuse
05-27-2012, 04:53 AM
First, thank you for taking the time out for listening.
This is an audio that goes along with the original series that I wrote and that the publishing house thought would be neat to have an audio version. Saying its a Radio Play I think now is incorrect. Its simply the story in audio form, like an ordinary book on tape. That was one reason why there is less FX then a Radio Play usually has.
The story can be read here: http://ebclockwork.blogspot.com/ Something else I probably should have added.
This episode is meant to open more questions then it answers, so I do hope you will continue to give the series a chance.
Once again, thank you!
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